MY THOUGHTS ON TRUE LOVE

Often, we mistake excitement or lust for love, but true love is completely rare and can’t be experienced just like that.

True love is a once in a lifetime experience, that never comes to anyone more than once.

You think am blabbing right? I know you would think that way, but trust me, it is the truth. True love comes once in a lifetime to every individual living.

You can’t be in love with someone today and fall out of love with that same individual tomorrow. You don’t fall in and out of love, like one jumping from one molue bus to another in the city of Lagos.

When you love someone genuinely, you would be willing and ready to do everything and anything for that fellow, you won’t see anything wrong with the fellow, and you would be willing to go through the fire with and for them, regardless.

You can be with someone for a very long time, for as long as twenty years, and still not love that individual, though you seldom find it difficult to differentiate the feelings, because you have grown so used to the fellow (it could be your spouse, relation, sister, brother, friend, etc.) overtime, that you now feel so comfortable to think that what you feel is true love.

There are individuals who are devoted and loyal to you, that you would mistake their attitude towards you to be genuine love and kindness, they are not. Even though these individuals would never dream of hurting you, they are just individuals, committed to keeping their words and obligations. This is why, you would meet a man who is married to a woman he does not love, but would treat her so well, that you would mistake their relationship foundation for that built on genuine love and friendship, but in his heart, he feels empty and knows something is missing, but can’t figure it out.

Let me give us a clear example of such feelings, from the parent angle, no parent who truly loves the child, would endanger the life of the child for their selfish gains, you won’t sell your daughter to a rich man for money and comfort, you won’t be comfortable with your son getting involve in crime, just to bail you out of poverty or one form of lack or the other.

A parent who truly loves you, would do everything possible to see you succeed, without demanding anything from you in return, but of course, expect you to show appreciation by equally reciprocating that love, by doing well and growing up responsible and making them proud.

It is not compulsory, that a mother would develop true love for a child that came to this world through her. Some parents do not truly love their children, not to mention spouses and friends out there, therefore, it is very apparent, that we understand how true love works, to avoid being beguiled and blackmailed emotionally for the rest of our lives.

SOME ATTRIBUTES OF TRUE LOVE
1. True Love is not selfish – A lot of us thinks it is when we are selfish, controlling and demanding, that is when we are exhibiting true love towards others. We are completely wrong with such thoughts and actions. True love is NOT selfish, it is completely considerate and always wants to see things from the other fellow’s point of view.
2. True love is understanding – When you are in love with an individual, you would make excuses for that individual, no matter what they do, you would be extremely understanding and hardly find faults. Most times when you eventual find faults, you make excuses for the fellow.

3. True love protects – Every individual in love, would do everything and anything to protect those they care about, regardless of the behavior or attitude of that individual. This is why parents who genuinely care about their children, wants to protect them in all spheres, no matter the character they exhibit. A man can’t conveniently marry a crazy woman and protect her from everyone, including herself.

4. True love completes and satisfies you – When you finally find or experience that one true love, you would feel fulfilled and complete inside of you. Every emptiness would disappear and this feeling of being protected and secure creeps into your heart. You are extremely content and satisfied. You would know that you have finally arrived your destination, without a single doubt in your heart.

5. True love is jealous, but not possessive – I know you would wonder what I mean by being jealous but not possessive. YES! Genuine love is extremely jealous, but not possessive. A lot of us mistake obsession and possessiveness for true love, while in reality, these are completely different feelings. An individual who is truly in love with you, would never want to cage or imprison you in their world alone, even when they are so much in love with you, they would be willing to allow you explore and live freely as long as you are not doing the wrong things nor breaking the rule. They support you in everything you do, and don’t impose their own rules and lifestyle on you. You are giving the freedom to make choices and follow your dreams and path.

6. True love is loyal – Often times, some of us have experienced situation where our so-called loved ones betray us or tarnish our image behind us and sometimes, in our very presence. NO individual genuinely in love with you, would betray you in anyway. They are always there to protect your interest and make positive excuses for your sake. Whoever the individual is, be it your spouse, relation, sibling, colleague, parents etc.
True love will never mock you behind and act all loving before you, your success and happiness is always their number one priority. They fight for you regardless of the consequences and standby you in hard and good times. They are the real RIDE n DIE soldiers in the battlefield of life with you.

There are so many attributes of true love, but we may not be able to talk about it all in this post, as I plan to discuss this topic from time to time here.